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Pat Pong

We got taken to the bus stop by our private transfer and got a public bus into town. We had no idea where to get off but luckily a toothless Singaporian (with a startling resemblence to gollom/schmeigal) was nice enough to show us where ‘Khao San’ was and where his uber cheap guest house was. As you can imagine golloms standards aren’t that high so we continued to look around. After looking at 3 more places we were bored of walking around and decided that this one would do for now so went and got lunch and a beer.

Lunch was amusing as we sat and people watched everyone on Khao San street and laughed. Girls traveling with wheely bags, ‘david beckham’ wannabes, a lot of washed up old westerners and strange men who look like they’ve escaped auchvitz (striped pajarmas and all).

All of which walking around thinking they are super cool and original as they are ‘traveling’ in thailand (where the white people outnumber the thais). Highly entertaining, we haven’t seen so many White people in 3 months it’s absolutely crazy. The beer and all this excitement knocked us out and we slept.

Woke up just in time to go and get a water taxi to south Bangkok and then we took a nice long walk into the centre in search of the Red Light District. After much walking and map consulting Jeremy was eventually offered a ping pong show. Woo hoo! But first some food.

We sat infront of a gay Australian with a Thai boy. To the right of an old man and a ladyboy and behind another old dude with two Thai boys! I think we might be in the right area.

We headed off back down the same street waiting to be offered a show again. Didn’t take long. Even victoria had someone shout at her ‘you want live f*cking show mam?’.

Sat with two cold Tiger beers watching the strangest show we have ever seen. To cut a long story short passable girls danced (badly) on the stage until it was time for mum or fatty to come out and blow a trumpet or pull a massive amount of tape from their Noo noos. The worst bit was the womans face who was pulling razor blades from herself, looked like she was about to burst into tears. The best bit was definately the firing of ping pongs into the small crowd to hit them back onstage with bats. it was just damn funny. Somewhere inbetween was watching mums vagina blow you some cigarette smoke. We left feeling slightly nauseous and got a taxi back to bed, feeling a tad traumatised.

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