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Valentines Day

J surprised V with a candlelit dinner for two on the river, complete with roses and chocolates. Was all very romantic.

NOT! In reality V pretended to have bought J a Valentines card, making J sweat quite profusely, then we went for a Mega Breakfast, played barefoot bowls and got drunk (definitely a more preferable series of events for both V&J).

I say ‘we’ got drunk but what I actually mean is most of us got pleasantly drunk and Mr Pack got completely annihilated apparently due to the severe lack of food not his new-found light-weightedness. The evening was short and definitely not sweet as Jeremy insisted on showing us his private parts and the inside of his bunghole. He then passed out on the kitchen floor, then the bedroom, where he got attacked by Andy and a bag of flour, followed by a potential molestation charge occurring in the bathroom, involving (in no particular order) Andy, Jack, a wooden duck, suncream, and a guitar, all of which penetrated Jeremy at some point.

Jeremy’s last words that evening, whilst standing naked in the bathroom covered in a cake mixture, were “I want Victoria to help me”. Surgical removal of household items and showering of kitchen condiments was swiftly followed by K.O-ing into bed.

All before 9.30pm.



  1. Han (Reply) on Monday-22, 2010

    Hahahaha!!! Bung bung i can’t believe you got raped by a duck!!! poor victoria. Sounds almost as good as my valentines day when me and mum stayed in together eating spag boll and watching a cringy movie!!!!!! swiftly followed by a bottle of wine each!!! xx

    • V & J (Reply) on Monday-22, 2010

      Sounds good bung bung. Beats the lighter fluid we were drinking I bet.

  2. walter matieu (Reply) on Thursday-25, 2010

    sounds similar to mr packs birthday!

    • V & J (Reply) on Friday-26, 2010

      Yes it was another stunning effort.


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